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12 July 2007
{9:57 PM} I just feel so horrible now, and it's not because of school or earthly things. I read hilary's blog, and i feel so pathetically pathetic. Like, she's so Godly, and i'm so un-Godly. I make empty promises to Him everyday, saying i'll do my best to be His light to the world, yet i think sick, gossip about others and just blatantly rebel. I feel like such a liar. I didn't even do my quiet time last night. i just didn't care and fell asleep. I so badly want to be closer to God, and to be a TRUE christian, but i just seem to forget Him once i'm not doing my quiet time. Sometimes i think God has given up on me. God, i promise, and i'll really try to be better. I'll try my best to obey and to abide in You. I really don't think it's right to gossip about others, i mean like, even if they're different from us, we should accept them, well, we're all special. How would you like it if others gathered together to gossip about you just because you're too skinny or fat or drama or ego or quiet or you have armpit hair or B.O or something? You also wouldn't like it right. I promise never to gossip or to take part in gossips again. I just hope i won't break my promise. cos then i'll feel like such a liar. I shall elaborate on the scary event in chinese class today.D: alison's phone beeped in class today. and then xie laoshi heard it. but she didn't know who's it was. laoshi: (in chinese) everyone take your phones out! *people start fidgeting with their phones, trying to switch them off* laoshi: stop touching your phones! laoshi:* starts checking the phones from the front row* it was then that i realised that my phone was ON. and i had already placed it on the table. and she was going to confiscate whosever phone that was on. i was so SCARED, my heart started racing like mad, as if i had just completed the 2.4 run. my hands went cold; and started shaking. and she was getting closer by the second. by this time, i was so scared, i was practically grabbing onto my phone that was on the table, and looking at laoshi with the SUPERISHLY anxious face. and she kept looking at me suspiciously. luckily alison owned up :# her hp got confiscated. and luckily i managed to rapidly flip the phone to the other side and turn it off. ah, relief. moral of the story: don't switch on your phone in class, and if you do, turn it to silent mode. hopefully alison gets her phone back. __________________________________________ |