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13 April 2008
{4:42 PM} Today's service was so meaningful, And it applied so much to me. For the first time in my life, I listened to every word the speaker said, holding on to every syllable, knowing that this was not simply a coincidence that this was being preached during the sermon, but because God was speaking through the speaker, to me. The speaker preached about David being pursued and hated by Saul, Even though he did not do anything against Saul. When David served Saul in the beginning, Saul wanted to kill David, but David never took revenge, And even though God did not vindicate straightaway, We know that at the end, David became a successful King, Even when Saul was no longer around, David spoke well of him. Seems to tell me how I should behave eh? Ignore everything and be oblivious, Get on with my slightly-not-so-optimistic life. I learnt today; Grief is not something we should avoid, It is a natural part of any human being's emotional process. Everyone has a right to grieve, and that includes Christians. Grief is just a process which everyone must take, to prepare us for the worse things that happen in the future. If we never experience emotional times, We'll just remain a delicate porcelain, broken once anything hits it. And through this grief, we grow up, we mature. And we become wiser, and not so naive and straight. Last night's chat cheered me up so much, It made me that happy girl once again, even if it was just for a few hours. I laughed, I spilt everything out from my heart, and how I felt, I became like that secondary one girl again, the girl who looked on the bright side of everything. At the end of it, even though that person fell asleep on me, D: There was this greater degree of optimism that i sensed, I'm not alone in this crisis after all. I want to thank that person, for empathizing with me, and for hearing all the lor-sor things i had to say. And for staying up with me to talk so much, I found out many things which I had never known before too, Momentarily it made me forget my difficulties. 5 hours is a record that has never been broken before. I'm surprised we actually could talk so much. I appreciate you very much, And i never want to lose this friendship ever. I don't want to hear what you have to write anymore, Because what good will it do me, knowing what you perceive about me? I'd rather concentrate on what's important in my life now. Treasuring my remaining faithful friends who still believe in me, And growing to be a stronger, more mature person. I momentarily thought about life last night, and i realised, you never do know your expiry date. And when your expiry date arrives, have you completed what you wanted to do in your life? Have you truly made the most out of the time you had. Are you ready to face God with the confidence that He'll say: "Welcome home." Ahaha, I'll get on with whatever that i have the responsibility to fufill. Jesus loves me this I know, that's what matters most. __________________________________________ |